Taylor Swift Likes 'Em Young

Here's a picture of Taylor Swift and her new boyfriend, high school student Harry Styles, whoever that is. Isn't she an adult? Why is she dating sophomores in high school now? Has that kid even started shaving? Is this legal? I wonder if they get the same looks I always get when I'm dating high school students. I bet they don't. What a sexist world we live in.

Megan Fox is a Time Lord

I know she's supposed to be hot and the internet has a non stop raging boner for her, and I'm sure she's a perfectly nice person but, is it just me or is Megan Fox not aging well? Keep in mind she was 26 years old when this picture was taken two days ago not 66 years ago like I originally thought.

UPDATE!: I have no idea what anything in this story means. This must have been written when I had a fever.

Doug Henning's Kid Buys a New House

Doug Henning, and Gallagher's son (those guys are gay aren't they?),  professional wooden board rider Shawn White just blew nearly $4 million on a new 3500 square foot beach front home...

Inside the posh property, the snowboarding superstar enjoys floor to ceiling ocean viewsin practically every room. His enormous deck overlooking the picturesque sea has a fir pit and more stairs leading up to the roof.

 For riding skate boards? Or snow boards? Or whatever the hell it is he does? What the hell? Gee, I'm glad I work hard and bust my ass every day. I'm sure if I keep my nose to the grindstone and try really hard, I'll bet my new $4 million dollar house is right around the corner.