Thursday, November 26, 2015

Zayne and Gigi and Bella and Austin and Madison...

Zayn Malik, Gigi Hadid and Bella Hadid met for lunch to discuss the alphabet soup that is their names. You know, just to make sure they have all the spellings straight. Maybe next time they can meet Zha Zha Gabor in Addis Ababa for dinner. And I promise that idiot has never heard a Social Distortion song and if I ever run into him I'll beat his ass just for owning it.

Amy Schumer is Walking Around

Eric Cartman was outside playing with his new phone and probably getting into some kind of wacky adventure.  What will it be this time? Trying to take over the world? Maybe going to get some KFC? Whatever it is I'm sure it will be hilarious.

Wednesday, November 25, 2015

Jennifer Lawrence is Talented

Jennifer Lawrence was named Entertainment Weekly's Entertainer of the Year and to celebrate she dressed up like a spooky ghost hitchhiker and attended the "Samsun The Hunger Ga Mocking Part 2" or something somewhere. Do you think she just sat there stone faced riding in silence staring straight forward out the windshield all the way to the theater? I wonder if the person that gave her a ride realizes what he's done by bringing her there and fulfilling the prophecy.

Tuesday, November 24, 2015

Lady Gaga Gets Out of a Car

Lady Gaga dressed up as Marilyn Manson for Halloween. Or maybe this is Marilyn Manson dressed up like Lady Gaga. I'm not sure now, I saved the picture but I forgot to label it and Halloween was like a month ago and I can't remember everything. Kind of like how most people don't remember either one of them.

Monday, November 23, 2015

Kylie Jenner is Life Like

Kylie Jenner and her robot face were at the AMAs last night looking like a Real Doll which probably isn't a very nice thing to say because I bet Real Dolls have a better personality.

AnnaLynne McCord Sheds Light on Awareness

AnnaLynne McCord was on Beverly Hills 90210? There must've been a remake I don't know about because I thought that went off the air in the mid-90's. I guess I should learn more about these celebrity types if I'm going to spend so much time making fun of them. Anyway, she attended ABCs Red Carpet Ribbon Awareness Ceremony and I'm sure she had a fine time before she returned to her lair and finished turning into a cobra.

Sunday, November 22, 2015

Johnny Depp Needs Some Sleep

What's with Johnny Depp? Suddenly he looks sort of bloated. And that suit doesn't look like it fits him very well either. Combine all that with the eyeliner, the ugly jewelry, wispy mustache, and the bi-sexual girlfriend and he could be a Whole Foods employee named Janice that needs Thursdays off to volunteer over at the animal shelter.