They said Heidi Klum "showed off her cleavage" which was mostly a lie, she didn't, because believe me I looked. Apparently this all took place on America's Next Top Model, which I had absolutely no idea was still on TV.
Heidi Klum is fuckin' smokin' but I get the very distinct feeling that being married to her would be exactly like being married to Paul Lynde. Okay let me explain. I think being married to either one of them would be like being surrounded by horseflies. At first it's kind of kooky and weird and fun and then after a while you notice yourself swatting at them and then eventually they would just drive you insane. I don't know why, it's just a feeling I get
