Friday, March 16, 2012

I Hate My Heart!

I guess God likes smashing things with a hammer too. Like comedian Gallagher's heart...
His manager, Craig Marquardo, tells TheWrap that Gallagher "had met a few fans and whatnot, and he was in the office (of Hat Tricks) when he felt a little tired. So he went in and sat down, and then (club employees) went in and checked on him and he wasn't feeling good, so they called an ambulance."He was feeling the onset of a heart attack," Marquardo says. "He just didn't know it at the time."
He'll be in the hospital for a few days but he'll be fine. And if he isn't, can you just imagine how fun the funeral is gonna be?  Ray Jay Johnson (You can call me Ray, and you can call me Jay, just be sure to call me an ambulance as fast as you can if I suffer a massive coronary and need to get to the ER today!)  will be there, Rick Dees will perform "Disco Duck," and if you bring some fruit maybe they'll let you smash it up with the coffin lid.

UPDATE!!  I just noticed....Why the fuck does "Disco Duck" have 1.5 million views??