Somebody Named Deena is Pregnant

Jersey Shore star Deena Cortese is still pregnant. And people are still writing about Jersey Shore "stars". I think she was Jwoww? Is that who she was? Why is this still something people pay attention too? I'm doing it because it's Sunday and there isn't much else going on, and this is something I do. What's your excuse, being dumb?

Jared Leto is Wacky

I spend probably 90% of my time here writing about hot women in there 40s etc. Why not? First, it's my blog. Second I'm a super macho dude that likes the ladies and they say "write what you know". So for a change I figured I'd throw the ladies a bone - as they say - and write about a 47 year old shirtless weirdo named Jared Leto. He posted this because it was his "birthday". I don't understand why you'd post a shirtless selfie because it's his birthday but he did. I thought he was an actor, then I thought he was in a band the name of which I have long forgotten and now I don't know what he is. But there he is in all of his 47 year old glory with abs and a Santa hat.I don't know if men get better as they get older like women as I've posited on so, so many occasions, but he has a big necklace so I guess that's something.  I bet he's short. Like 5'9.


!!!SEXY UPDATE!!!

I checked Google and wouldn't you know it? He's 5'9. I'm a genius

Kendall Jenner has a Flat Tummy

Kendall Jenner posted this picture to her Instagram and someone wrote a story about it complimenting her on her flat "tummy". She's 23 years old, she supposed to have a flat stomach. She hasn't had enough time to get fat yet. Plus, after looking at her for a while she looks like one of those people that can eat Doritos and cupcakes for breakfast never do one single sit up and still fit into the same clothes they wore in high school. Fuck you Jeff.

Blanca Blanco Sits Around

Blanca Blanco, who's name translated means White White, did a photo shoot dressed like Sophia Loren and people said "Hey she looks like Sophia Loren". I'm not sure why she did this exactly, but they're both women with dark hair and they both have boobs of course, so yeah she's just like Sophia Loren. Full disclosure: I never really "got" the whole Sophia Loren thing but I guess being different is what makes the world go 'round.

Jessica Simpson is Pregnant

Jessica Simpson is pregnant. Really, really pregnant. Really really REALLY pregnant. I don't think I've ever seen anyone this pregnant.  No one in the future of space and time will ever be this pregnant again.

Jenji Kohan is on the Market

Get in line fellas because Orange is the New Black creator Jenji Kohan filed for a divorce from her husband Luke Perry or whatever the fuck his name is. Good luck to the both of them during this trying time. Hey look it's Christmas okay so it was either this, or something about some brain dead idiot named Madison Beers. Guess who won the coin toss.

Madison Beer is Somebody

Two nobodies - Madison Beer and her boyfriend Zack Bia - roamed the streets aimlessly after leaving a North London Lobotomy clinic. See what universal style health care gets you? You get stories about the living dead wandering the streets, dressed up to go nowhere in particular while people take their picture for no reason. God I look forward to 2019 when the apocalypse finally arrives.


!!!SEXY UPDATE!!! I accidentally hit "publish" instead of "save" a little while ago when I was writing this and some people already saw it so I may as well just post it now. Way to ruin the surprise.