Sharon Stone is in a Pool

Sharon Stone is 58 years old and looks like this in a bikini. I saw this picture and I just thought I'd mention that. And I saw Basic Instinct but I barely remember it. It had something to do with murder or lesbians or something but I have no idea. Would you believe I somehow managed to miss that one scene everyone always talks about, and to this day I've never seen it so I have no idea what happens. She spreads her legs? She crosses her legs? I don't know. I assume she pulls a bunch of handkerchiefs, or maybe a bird out of there like a magician because otherwise I don't see what the big deal is.

Christie Brinkley is a Miracle on Long Legs

Christie Brinkley posed for more pictures which is what she's basically done her entire life. I really just posted this to point out once again that she's 62 years old. Four years younger than my mother. And I'd appreciate it if you'd leave my mother out of this I have enough problems already.

Happy Birthday Eva Longoria

Eva Longoria turns 38 years old today. Yes 38. What that means is, if you're a high school senior reading this, she could very easily be your mother. And you can trust me, if your 38 year old mother looks like that while she's doing the dishes, I'm going to try to have sex with her. I don't really have a joke here because this was more of a fact filled kind of story.

Stephanie Seymour Looks Okay

Oh dear God. Stephanie Seymour wandered around some sun baked paradise in a bikini because she can, and holy shit she's 44? I personally know 24 year olds that don't look even half this good. I'm going to link the page I stole this from but only so you can read the comments on the story bitching about the fact that she's smoking in one of the pictures. If you're a gay man that can't appreciate a 5' 10" woman that looks like a comic book super-heroine come to life, or a bitchy 16 year old high school freshman cheerleader, then I suppose you have to find something to bitch about because she could be eating a plate of fried kittens for all I care.

And yes I realize it's starting to look like this is slowly turning into the hot middle aged woman page, but it's my page and all the internet has to do is quit providing me with pictures of hot middle aged women and I'll stop.

Happy 2013

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