Friday, October 28, 2016

Lady Gaga's Costume Makes Sense Now. Sort of.

Lady Gaga continued what she's calling her "Dive Bar Tour" which goes a long way explaining how she's been dressing lately. Now you KNOW Lady Gaga has never actually been in a dive-bar because nobody dresses like that in a dive bar. A real dive bar has an old man sitting there starring off into space with a beer and a glass of water sitting in front of him at 11:30 in the morning. And at night it's sometimes got scary looking guys shooting pool and a couple of 53 year old overweight women with terrible hair-dos and low cut tops playing Bon Jovi and Journey or maybe sometimes Thin Lizzy (if you're lucky) songs on the jukebox. A real dive bar doesn't have the kind of J.A.P.-y looking daughter of a periodontist pretending to be a hillbilly hanging out in there with a bunch of gay, shirtless ab mannequins hanging on her every word. I have a very strong feeling that when Lady Gaga got pulled over when she was on spring break in Corpus Christi back in her younger days the second question she would ask the cop was "Don't you know who I am?"  You want to go to a dive bar Lady Gaga? I'll take you to a dive bar. Bring your body guards.

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