Larry Wilmore Gets Cancelled

Comedy Central cancelled "The Larry Wilmore Show" or whatever it was called. Maybe you've heard of him. No? Well I guess that explains that. But don't worry some guy that wears a suit will provide you a more in depth explanation.

In explaining the decision, Comedy Central president Kent Alterman said Monday it came down to the show's inability to register with viewers. "Unfortunately, it hasn't connected with our audience in ways that we need it to, both in the linear channel and in terms of multiplatform outlets and with shareable content and on social platforms as well."

That last sentence says it all. What he should have said was..."Larry wasn't providing enough sound bites that people could mindlessly repeat  ad nauseam on Twitter until you want to punch a baby in the face".  Too bad Lenny your show will be missed. By someone. I guess. But hey everyone look at the bright side. If you're a mediocre comedian that can really connect with 24-40 year old dumbasses, there's a slot open for you at Comedy Central.

Margot Robbie Isn't Dead

I just read an article where they asked "Who will be the next Margot Robbie?" and since I don't know who Margot Robbie is I figured she was some starlet that OD'd at a Playboy Mansion orgy in the 70's and they were looking for someone new to take her place in Hollywood. You know what I mean? It turns out she isn't dead. I have no idea what they're talking about there's her picture right there.  I don't know why she needs replacing. And I still don't know who she is. Maybe they long for the good old days when she was in quirky independent movies or something. You know, like way back in 2008. And a cute blonde in Hollywood? You'd think anyone they chose to replace her would stick out like a sore thumb

Happy Birthday Halle Berry

Halle Berry turned 50 yesterday. Just for reference, Ann B. Davis, the woman that played the maid Alice, on The Brady Bunch was 41 when that series started. I personally know girls literally half Halle's age that don't look half as good.

Jessica Alba Sits By a Pool

Jessica Alba is 35? I guess she's just been famous for so long I thought she was older. Of course there's no way you could tell, most of these celebrity pictures are photo shopped so much they look like cartoon charterers that entered our world through someone's television set that had radioactive material spilled on it.  In fact, moments after this picture was taken Jessica grabbed a big pool umbrella, jumped over the side of that high rise building and floated safely to the ground.

JoJo and Jordan Trade Names

Life&Style Magazine says Jojo Fletcher cheated on Jordan Rodgers and I'm only writing this to tell you I don't know which one is which. Is JoJo the girl? Or is Jordan the girl? Do you people really watch and pay attention to this garbage? No wonder the world is in the state it's in.

Amy Schumer Doesn't Care What You Think

Amy Schumer said she doesn't care what you think. I don't care what she thinks so I guess that makes us even. I know I said I wouldn't write about Amy Schumer anymore but me and Amy Schumer don't care what you think remember?

Tracy Anderson is a Guru

This story originally started out about noted flake Gwyneth Paltrow who sometimes I think is very hot, while other times I think she kind of looks like my friend Vinnie so it can be very uncomfortable for me. Then I saw a picture of her personal trainer Tracy Anderson and quickly shifted gears but then once again I noticed the black sandals she was wearing and just gave up. But by that time, I'd already started typing so it was too late. Have fun staring at her sandals.