Monday, June 15, 2020

Jason Derulo Conquers the World

Jason Derulo is suddenly all over the news these last couple of weeks, and I don't really know why. He must have a new album or movie coming out or something. In fact here he is after he pulled up to a restaurant in his lime green Lamborghini, while dressed like a Victorian end table in a funeral parlor (bow tie included), and his arm candy girlfriend Jessica Something (trust me I'm looking for her name on PornHub right now) who I can almost guarantee wouldn't even look at that bozo if he didn't have the money to buy a lime green Lamborghini. But that's just how it goes sometimes. If you want a girlfriend that looks like a Greek statue when she's naked, you just need a bright lime green car, dress like a comic book villain and $50 million dollars in the bank. Sorry I don't make the rules.