Ryan Reynolds Annoys Me

I saw this story about Ryan Reynolds wearing jeans. Seriously that was the whole story. I have no idea why Ryan Reynolds wearing jeans is important or why he annoys me so much.  If I was in one of those giant tractor trailers and saw Ryan Reynolds in a cross walk like this, I would turn him into a red stain on the pavement. He just strikes me as a smart ass like you'd meet at some fancy prep school. Fuck this asshole.

Britney is Lost

I'm posting this so I can say I'm now officially concerned about Britney Spears' face. What is going on? It's like three shades darker than the rest of her body. And she looks...tired? Maybe she's using one of those face tanning machines. And is she hypnotized? Lobotomized? What? Don't worry Brit, I'm here for you. Let's take off that stuffy dress.

One of the Heathers Went to the Beach

My friend sent me this picture of a woman she swears is Heather Locklear. No not this Heather Locklear, Whatever. If she wants to take her new giant boobs to the beach that's fine with me. I was always partial to Heather Thomas anyway, who even today looks like America's Number One MILF pornstar unlike that other Heather who we will no longer mention starting now. Don't worry Heather, I'm over that other Heather.

Site News

Okay so I haven't written in almost a week. Big deal. I'm writing as we speak. Check back here for more fresh content hot off the griddle

Ashley Graham is Active

Ashley Graham was photographed on her jet ski as she sped away to get some hot dogs.I assume that's why she's wearing a red swimsuit. To hide the ketchup stains.

John Mellancamp is a Hunk of Burning Love

John Cougar Mellencamp has entered the Elvis/Old Las Vegas/Freemont Street Gambler phase of his life. Have fun John! Say hi to Jimmy the Scumbag for me next time you see him.

One For the Ladies

Here's a new male model. Go him! I didn't know his name at first so I originally labeled the picture as "stud" but it seems his name is Bonner Bolton which is a stupid fucking name. If you're going to pick a fake name why not Lance Manion, or Duke McFist? And those jeans he's wearing? $158.00. You'd have to be out of your fucking mind to spend $158 on a pair of jeans. Sears has jeans for $20 and then you'd have $138 left to blow on your lady. Or in his case his horse, or whatever the fuck this idiot does for fun. It isn't mapping the human genome in his downtime I can tell you that right now.