Pamela Anderson Nude

This story originally started out about Pamela Anderson hence the story title. Plus when people search for Pamela Anderson Nude on Google this shows up. Pretty tricky right?  Anyway there were other pictures included and I got distracted. Plus I just wrote about her and she isn't returning my calls.  This was some party for some lingerie line she's involved with now (Coco de Mur?) and for some reason I never get invited to those things. I guess it could be because of all the ugliness last time but I don't know. Whatever man, I don't care about your stupid lingerie anyway jerks.

Julia Roberts Makes a Movie

Julia Roberts plays a bag lady in her newest movie, "Julia Roberts the Bag Lady". She hid all of her glamour to appear as a homeless crack head in this gripping tale of loss and seduction. I'm kidding. It's a movie called Ben is Back but I accidentally closed the page where I was reading about it and I'm not looking for it again so I don't know what it's about or who else is in it. Probably some guy named Ben. I'm not even 100% sure I got the title correct. Let's face it, you're not going to see this piece of crap anyway.

Seal is Huge

The original article where I saw this picture said Seal was a "mega-star". He was married to Heidi Klum until 2014 right? So I guess that sort of qualifies. Plus his greatest hits album was released almost 10 years ago so maybe because it's not my type of music he was always just off my radar. I guess I sort of remember last year when he *played Soldier Field here in Chicago during his year long worldwide stadium tour.** It was also a story about how he was being interviewed on Australian radio by someone named Jackie O because of some Australian reality show or something because Australia is known for being a hot bed of celebrity activity.  What was that song? Touched by an Angel? I really don't remember. I know I hear it on radio stations where they also play UB40 and that one other group. You know the one. They do that song? I don't remember. Pet Shop Boys? Anyway, have fun doing whatever it is you're doing.



*didn't happen.
**also didn't happen


!!!!SEXY UPDATE!!!!  This story pretty much blows more than usual so I would understand if you didn't read it

Mariah Carey Has a Staff Writer

The original title of this photograph was "Mariah Carey Shows Off Her Svelte Figure". I happened to see this while I was checking what the weather was like in Fantasy Land and figured you guys might like to see it too.

Tina Fey Gets an Award

Hey everybody here's someone I never write about. Tina Fey. She was at the New York Stage and Film Gala accepting the award for the World's Most Overrated Female Comic. She was on SNL and in the movie Mean Girls which I thought was kind of a cute movie I guess. She was a member of the Second City thing here in Chicago and lived here with her perm for a while I guess  so every time she goes to the bathroom I have to hear about how hilarious it was. I'm typing all of this nonsense so I can avoid having to read the article where I stole this picture because I really don't give a shit what Tina Fey does. Ever. She's hot as Hell and I'm sure very nice, she's just not funny. And if you're a "comic" being funny is the most important thing. And don't point to SNL because that garbage dump hasn't been funny for 30 years. Unless of course you're my mom, than SNL is biting social commentary and really skewers everyone.

Whatever Happened to Pamela Anderson

Pamela Anderson continued her descent into madness when she attended some event in London at Morton's dressed like a 17th Century Japanese sex painting. We have a Morton's here but it's a steak restaurant. Imagine a place filled with middle aged, middle management type guys in suits TALKING REALLY LOUDLY and paying too much for mediocre food and it'll be like you're actually there. Also we have an arboretum here called The Morton Arboretum but I doubt she went there. Of course I guess you never know she's nuttier than a bag of peanuts in a peanut factory or something. All she needs is Bette Davis pushing her around in a wheel chair and the transformation will be complete. I have no idea who that dude is taking her picture but I hope the paparazzi use more than the camera on their phones. Shit I have a camera on my phone. Give me a call PAm we'll shoot some "tasteful" pics. You don't have hepatitis anymore right?

Britney Spears Looks Good in Pink

Britney Spears wore a dress that's probably illegal in some Southern states and posted the pictures on Instagram. I'm all for it. I am, as I've suggested in the past however, concerned about her face. There isn't anything wrong with it physically, but does it seem weird to you? I don't know something is off. She looks dazed all the time. I'll tell you what Britney, let's discuss the problem with your face over drinks. Did I mention I like pink?