And you don't even really know her. See, that's the problem today, everybody is concerned with what everybody else is doing. Mind your own business. Walking around in a alcohol fueled haze is fun when you're 22, but that's no way to spend the last 30 years of your life and I can definitely fix her.
Anyway, she was on her way to the "South by Southwest Festival" for some reason although I don't know what they even do there anymore. Man she's hot though isn't she?
They all seem mildly okay and that's pretty much it. A movie you can watch while you do something else. But they don't make movies for me anymore, they make movies for people in China and other jungle countries where they let people out of the or sweatshop factory long enough to eat bats with rice and soup made out of leaves. Which is probably why if I buy a t-shirt online now, I have to order a XXL because they think anyone that's taller than 5'3 and weighs more than 101 pounds surely must be a two legged hippopotamus
They also insisted he's 63 years old. Look at that picture and then me in the face and tell me that isn't a 75 year old man. That's not a slam, I only hope to live to be at least 75 years old. I just won't walk around in white shoes and tan pants
Happy birthday Eva Mendes! She turned 51 and then did an ad for Stella McCartney, who I assume isn't married to Paul McCartney although she very well may be since I don't know who Stella McCartney is. I also assume she makes dresses or maybe shoes but I can't be bothered to look it up.
I think I know Eva Mendes from MTV? Is that what she did? Her existence has been in the periphery of my knowledge of the world for just about as long as I remember, but I don't remember why, or her being this hot. I do know she's married to Ryan Gosling who I like about as much as accidentally sitting in a giant salad bowl full of poison ivy.
Ryan Gosling is the white version of Lenny Kravitz. He suddenly appears out of thin air, people talk about him for three months and then he vanishes again. Kind of like a cicada. I can't think of two people less deserving of their fame and fortune than Ryan Gosling and Lenny Kravitz but they're here now and it's just something I have to deal with, and the fact that she married that guy now taints everything else she does. Have fun with Ryan Gosling and your millions of dollars, losers
Here's Millie Bobby Brown again. I don't know why she's everywhere all of the sudden and I don't know how that kind of weird PR works or if there's a big office you go to, to set this kind of thing up where there's a sudden explosion of media coverage for you and I refuse to do any checking.
Now look at that picture and tell me those two people are in the very early 20s. Especially Millie Bobby Brown. They aren't, and you don't have to be Inspector Gadget to figure that out. If you asked me to guess her age from this picture alone, I would have guessed mid to late 30s and certainly not the 21 she claims to be.
Just as an example, Ralph Macchio was 23 when The Karate Kid came out and not 16 like he was supposed to be in the movie. So it's not as if lying about your age is a criminal offense, if it was 99% of Hollywood would be in Guantanamo Bay.
I think I've written about Michelle Randolph before, most likely because she's hot. It wasn't until I wrote this this morning that I realized her name isn't Michelle "Landman" but that's the name of a show that's she's on. None of that changes the fact that I love her and want her to have my baby but that's something we'll have to discuss as a couple. I swear to God you people watch the worst crap imaginable just because it's on the flashing noise box in your living room.
They said fans were left "baffled" by Millie Bobby Brown's "real" age when it was "revealed" she's "21". Most people said they thought she was a decade older than that. And do you know why you thought that? Because she is. That's a 31 -- at least -- year old woman. They said all of this while she was standing next to her "22" year old husband (no known photographs). You believe that? Some 21 year old is married? In Hollywood? In 2025?
I've been alive for a while now, and I've lived in the third largest city in the country for most of my life. I've had multiple jobs, and owned multiple businesses and done all kinds of crazy shit, and do you know how many 21 year olds I've met that were married? Out of all the uncountable thousands of people I've ever met in my lifetime?
One.
So be real. A 21 year old is a junior in college. Does the woman in that picture really look like a junior in college to you? If it does you need to leave the house once in a while. Plus she's hot, and I'm not attracted to woman that are under 35 and my Sex Radar would let me know if she was. I honestly don't understand this age shaving that's still going on in this day and age but that's the world we live in. So she's 34 (that would be my guess) who gives a shit. I'm not even sure why I know the name Millie Bobby Brown, until about 10 minutes ago I thought he was a rapper in the 80s or something.