I have no idea why I insist on writing about Kristin Cavallari, I mean, who really gives a fuck. I can't understand why they talk about her so much in England. Don't they have plastic blondes there? Since I'm here, she has a new boyfriend I guess. Some guy named Jeff that of course wears a baseball jacket. Why wouldn't he? They look like a couple of Standard Issue Assholes to me. Just like thousands of couples you'd see enjoying a night on the town in Chicago's River North neighborhood. Imagine a lot of super expensive bars, restaurants that are more expensive than that, dress codes from the 1990s, very limited free parking, and people from Schaumburg and Northbrook that think the only way into the city is to get off at the Ohio Street exit. Whatever. I hope your car gets towed and you have to find some way to get to Lower Wacker Drive while walking in four inch heels. Schmuck.
