Wednesday, April 1, 2020

Whoopsie

I love how people that have been telling me for a month that shutting everything down was for "everyone's own good" and seems "completely reasonable" are now suddenly shocked that on the first of the month their rent is due and needs to be paid. Get your $1200 stimulus check yet? What about unemployment? How much is that, half of what you were earning just a few weeks ago? Maybe they'll accept toilet paper in lieu of cash.

 It's unbelievable, they didn't even bother to think 3 weeks in advance and so now what? What about next month? How about the month after that? 12 weeks go by in the blink of an eye and suddenly you're $5000 (FIVE THOUSAND) dollars behind on your rent or mortgage. Do you have $5000 laying around? I don't, and guess what, you won't either because you're not working "to save lives", so where are you going to get it? You won't. And banks and landlords aren't Santa Claus they want their money. You my friend, as they say, are fucked. The governor of Illinois, J.B. Pritzker, has never had a job and $4 billion dollars in the bank.  He just extended our little life saving adventure for another month, but he doesn't care about bills. He's probably never even seen a "bill". But he'll be a hero to dopes on the internet that think life is rainbows and unicorns in Fantasyland. I'm already in very serious financial trouble here in my own house, still think every thing needs to be shut down until June? Will you even be able to buy food in a couple months?

 Does all of this suddenly seem reasonable now? Sure stay home, "stay safe". Forget about you for a second, you're an adult. Where are your kids going to live? Will the place you worked before all of this insanity began even be there when you get back?  I've been warning anyone that would listen this was going to happen for a month and they all looked at me like I said "Hitler was right". Unfortunately for you, reality doesn't care about your empty platitudes. You can think fondly about all of those lives you saved while you're starving in an alley.

 You know, you're just lucky Jennifer Aniston keeps me calm.